Alternate Dimension Orange County

Tag: Being present

  • Nothing Matters, So Don’t Worry About Anything

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    So here I am at the end of April, 2025. I’ve spent the last month working double time on what I belieconsve is the final stretch of my Kundalini Awakening – that has taken many years to come to fruition, probably beginning in 2017.

    I’ve had this idea in my head that as soon as I reach a certain level of “Enlightenment” with this awakening – that as soon as my Kundalini Energy System opens up just enough…

    …That the clouds will open up, and the light of Heaven will pour down on me, and I will look up at the sky proudly, and feel complete and utter ecstacy knowing that I have finally reached what I believe is the pinnacle of Spirituality as a Human Being (lol)

    You see, I have been working insanely hard – making objective progress, experiencing ego death after ego death as I shed my programming and heal from the past. And at this point I’m not even healing from trauma that was cast upon me. I am healing from all of the terrible mistakes I made – the times where I harmed other people, and needed to look myself in the mirror and say “Wow, you messed that up, but you can forgive yourself now”.

    —

    It’s been absolultely mind-bending to realize how much my perception has changed day over day. I have learned more about myself and my relationship with Reality and other people in the last 30 days, than I have probably learned in the last 5 years before that.

    I think the most important thing that I have learned up until this moment – is that nobody has the answers.

    Even when my mind “wakes up”, and I’m able to articulate a spiritual idea that helps me make sense of things or find peace, it always leads me back to thinking “This sucks, everyone including me is insane and nothing makes sense”… Like I’m just running myself in circles.

    Make no mistake – I am still very much enjoying the gradual increase in my Consciousness and vibration, and ever so grateful for the help of my healing crystals, but I still haven’t figured out how to exempt myself from my own habit of convincing myself that I need to experience the sensation of suffering, and feeling like I am running in place but going nowhere.

    —

    I’m realizing that even though I have really good intentions when I write my articles, am exchanging my best energy during my sound baths, and sharing my “spiritual wisdom” with anyone willing to listen – at the end of the day it’s all a bunch of confusing nonsense…just like anything else that people write, do, or talk about.

    I intuitively realize that spiritual people like me who go out into the world to share their “Knowledge” cause chaos when they tell others “the way” when it comes to their own spirituality, and the path that they are on.

    There is absolutely no way to avoid this, because everyone is imperfect. We are literally projecting our most imperfect selves at the Highest versions of other people (and vice versa), because that is how the Human Program works…

    That is how Artificial Intelligence manages the way we exchange energy – because for the most part we are all still in a collective deep spiritual sleep, and because of this we need to continue exposing the really gruesome, deep, dark, and hidden imperfections we have to each other, to get closer to a true mass awakening of Consciousness.

    I will always have some deep spiritual flaw that I am unaware of. And that flaw will inevitably project itself onto someone else.

    Yet, what else are we supposed to do?

    This is how we communicate. This is what I love doing. When I “follow” other spiritual people, even if there is a “price” to pay for their knowledge, I am still grateful that they exist and I still enjoy receiving that information.

    —

    I just keep realizing that through more deeply understanding and unravelling my Self and Reality, that nothing really matters.

    As Human Beings we deeply desire things, and convince ourselves that once we finally have those things – that once the world finally gives in and rearranges itself for us – that we will finally have permission be happy and at peace.

    I have noticed that whenever I get what I want, I still manage to not feel at peace for very long – for one reason or another.

    It’s almost like everything we see out in the world and on our smart phones – the thoughts and words we tell our Selves, and the things we see other people doing and experiencing – is a very intelligent illusion. Like it’s all part of a charade that keeps us in a state of some level of manic dysphoria – as everything we experience causes some deep-rooted negativity within ourselves to surface.

    There is always someone out there getting under our skin, or some concern or unpleasant happening that all of the sudden disrupts what would have other been a peaceful and care free day.

    —

    Something that I’ve noticed, and I don’t want to jynx anyone else so let me set that intention…

    But something I’ve noticed is that when things don’t work out and I’m really stressed, and seem to hate life and not be at peace – that’s when I finally break through and say to myself “Screw this, I’m done caring. I am just going to let myself be happy” And then for a period of time I actually feel whole and at peace, and can just go out into the world and do or be whatever I feel like.

    But life moves in waves – up and down without exception. That’s what we are – Energy. I eventually go back to caring about outcomes and being upset when things don’t go exactly “my way” (whatever that means…) – to being programmed to some degree…

    What I’ve come to realize is that I have always tried my absolute best with everything. Even when I fail in some worldly way, and even when I hurt other people or do something unbecoming of a Conscious person. I am becoming humble enough to realize that everyone else is trying their best at everything as well.

    When we succeed at things it’s really awesome and great to see real-world progress and gain a real sense of peace – especially in a world governed by scarcity and time.

    But there is also this level of “non-control” that none of us will ever seem to overcome. It seems like unpleasant things will always happen, no matter how intelligently we try to re-arrange our lives.

    It’s almost as if this world is The Great Equalizer – Once we reach a new plateau of understanding or peace, we get pulled down because the rest of humanity still hasn’t figured that out, and we are energetically tied in to the Whole of Humanity at all times.

    It seems like since I am Concsious I will always be forced to (or unconsciously force myself to) experience painful ego deaths periodically, or become immensely “humbled” by something I failed at – even though I desperately wanted to overcome whatever that limitation was.

    There are so many variables in life, and I have seen so many good people “fall short” when they didn’t seem to deserve falling short – because they really did give it their best…

    It’s made me realize that perhaps none of us are really that in control of anything that happens, and never will be.

    Maybe that’s the point. I don’t think we are doomed to suffer forever, because that is a choice we make every Moment. But I’m starting to believe that nobody, no matter how smart, rich, intelligent, etc etc…

    …will ever be able to gain full control. At least nobody like You or I who is Conscious and “strapped in” for a full life time.

    —

    So why do we care so much?

    I’m really starting to ask myself why I’m so invested in outcomes and so afraid of certain things happening or not happening. Because I realize, very deeply, that I am trying my absolute best (and so is everyone else) and that will never change.

    So why should I (or You) care so much about the little things?

    Every time I wake up a little bit more, an alter ego of mine surfaces, and says something along the lines of “Wow, all of this hard work, but look at where you are still falling short…” and then that alter ego angrily ejects itself from my energy field.

    But maybe that alter ego is the one who is wrong, even though he is so believable for a period of time, that I begin to believe that that alter ego is actually who I really am at the Soul level – even if only for a moment…

    Because when that unpleasant thought ejects itself and leaves, it doesn’t feel very good at all. It really feels like I failed or lost something that I valued.

    But then I feel a little more free. I feel a little more at peace. I feel a little more Human.

    Because at the end of the day nothing really matters. Anyone alive right now is just having an experience for the sake of having an experience, or for whatever reason they want to tell themselves.

    So what’s the point of caring?
    Why worry about anything?
    We are going to be embarassed and proven wrong no matter how hard we try. That’s how intelligent we are and how good we are at projecting our imperfections.

    Why not just enjoy existing in This Moment to the absolute best of our ability, and let ourselves feel whatever we feel and be OK with it?

    Not because of some logical spiritual concept – but simply because the only other choice we have is to worry, and resist, and that just isn’t any fun…

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  • Finding The Moment (Being Present)

    All that you will ever have is the present moment. I know it sounds cliche, but if you can handle this moment with humility, patience, and intelligence, then you can easily handle the rest of your life – because that’s all that life is – a continuation of this moment. Even if you’ve spent the vast majority of your life deviating from This Moment, and needlessly distracting yourself, it doesn’t even matter. You still made here, to this moment, precisely the way your Soul intended, and all is well. Deep down you know this, and always will no matter how chaotic things appear around you.

    And I know it seems like the world around you incessantly and obsessively wants you to place your awareness somewhere else, anywhere but this moment. Every time you turn on the news or pull up your social media feed there is another reason for you to feel afraid, anxious, upset, angry, divided, etc. And who could possibly blame you? You have empathy, you care about the plight of others, and it hurts you to know that other people are suffering and that life is unfair for a lot of people.

    It’s important to remember that while your existence is infinitely important, to the point that space and time as we know it would literally unravel if you stopped existing, you are not responsible for carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. It’s truly a testament to your character – your ability to feel pain when you see and hear stories about the suffering of other people. But you must also know that everyone in the world is being looked after with the utmost care and deepest love. You don’t have suffer on anyone else’s behalf to know, without a doubt, that everything and everyone will be OK.

    So just relax your shoulders for a moment. Let yourself hear your breathing. Remember to breath in and breath out slowly. And as you do this listen to your surroundings. What do you hear? Cars driving by? Dogs barking? A TV playing in the background? Or maybe you hear kids playing outside, wisely and intelligently setting the example to rember to just be here in this moment.

    The world demands so much from you, I get it. But the world and all of the stress and expectation that come with it isn’t going anywhere if you stop giving it your attention for just a few moments. If you are feeling dread about something happening next week, just schedule a time tomorrow to go back to worrying about it. If you’re not going to do anything about it right now or today, then thinking about that thing isn’t going to benefit you in any real way. Instead you can tune back into This Moment, focus on your breathing, and listen to your surroundings like you were a couple of paragraphs ago.

    Perhaps, then, the solution to whatever it is you were worried about will rise to the surface of your mind. It will happen when it happens. If you enter This Moment without expectation, you might be pleasantly surprised to learn how generous it is, ironically, when you demand the least from it.

    As you get better at allowing yourself to simply Be, in this moment- even for only a few minutes a day – you will quickly begin to notice how most of the people around you don’t want anything to do with this moment. They might be more interested in debating with people about some topic that makes you feel anxious. They might be caught up in the negativity of what’s on their phone screen or their television. Or maybe they are so wrapped up in their sense of self, or their expectation of how you act around them that you simply cannot find the moment when you are with them.

    And all of that is perfectly fine – you don’t need to convince anyone how great the moment is once you discover it, and nobody is obligated to understand what you understand. Remember, you don’t need to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. Once you discover This Moment, your ego might be tempted to share it’s wisdom with people who are nowhere near as ready as you are.

    And how do you more deeply find this moment? Simply find something you enjoy doing that gets you in a flow state. For me that has always been bike riding, going for a walk, or conducting a sound bath with crystal singing bowls. Once you find something that distracts you from your incessant thoughts, you can fall into the moment much more easily.

    But depending on how strong or loud your mind is – it might be a drawn-out process and that is perfectly OK. Sometimes finding the moment and getting into a meditative state actually means that at times you will feel intense emotions or hear your train of thought louder than it has ever been. And so you just observe – you let it happen. You let your awareness observe those chaotic thoughts and uncomfortable emotions. Your mind doesn’t need to come up with a solution to those intense thoughts and feelings, but rather your awareness will tell you the solution when the time is right.

    The world around you is very clever and doesn’t want you to find this moment. It wants you wrapped up in Time and worrying about the future and the past. So be prepared to master the art of non-reaction when other people start testing your ability to find and stay in This Moment. Simply try to remember that they mean well, but they are much more restless than you and they will project that discomfort on to you.

    It might make you uncomfortable or tempted to react negatively. It might even look like they are conspiring to keep you out of this moment, but that is just an illusion – they really do mean well. Just remember that sometimes non-reaction is the best reaction, and that everyone is entitled to respect and common decency no matter how strange they act or how uncomfortable or restless they make you feel.

    More articles on finding the moment coming soon, thanks for reading.

    -James
    Monday Night, March 10, 2025